Tag Archives: what women want

What Women Want – Love

At the root core, I think this this is what we all want – to be loved by someone else.  We feel important and seen.

The tricky thing is…everyone’s language of love is different.

For example, when I go visiting my folks, I feel loved when we sit down and chat and are focused on one another.  But my mom feels loved by being in the kitchen and cooking up a storm.

Being loving makes her feel loved. But when she does that, I feel bit abandoned I’m not the focus and it’s difficult to focus on her while she’s multi-tasking or I’m helping.

It ever so slightly changes the dynamic and that energetic flow/connection we talked earlier. So, we don’t have the same love language.

It was a great eye opener when we realized this disconnect.

How do you figure out what makes someone feel loved?

Ask them. They’ll give you the right answer.

But remember, with the next person you date…the love language will change so you can’t assume it’s the same (actually, that’s really dangerous territory!). So, you have to ask again.

Subscribe to the RSS feed; next week’s topic: What Women Want – Help With The Mundane Tasks of Daily Life

If you missed it, last week’s topic was:  What Women Want – Connection

Get the full list at:  What Women Want – The List

Image purchased from istockphoto.

What Women Want – Connection

What is connection?

It’s the invisible path of energy/love/warmth/compassion/good feelings between two people.  Notice the word two people. When you’re in a romantic relationship with a women this is a closed loop.  That’s why some women go all wonky when they sense your energy path of warmth zoom over to another woman.  It’s a closed loop.  We are secure, confident and without worry when it’s a closed loop.  Open the loop, it all goes to hell.  Don’t believe me…try it and see (however, please note that I’m not recommending it!)

What makes a women feel connected with you?

Gosh darn it, it’s gonna be different for each amazing woman.  The biggest tip here is this:

When you first start dating someone:

  • Watch what actions you do/words you say that light her up (she’s feeling the most connected to you now.
  • Memorize this
  • Keep doing those things…especially after you’ve been together awhile

Are there “standard” things that make a woman feel connected?

I’ll start the list, please add in your own observations in the comments.

  • Touch.  But be careful, there are two kinds of touch.
    • There’s the type of touch (ex: hand on hand, or shoulder) when you are just sharing warmth or compassion. We can sense that you are giving to us and not asking anything in return.
    • Then there’s the touch that says “yo baby, let’s go get frisky“.  That’s good too but be clear that we know you are wanting something from us, this feels more like you are taking than giving.  On a day that’s been really tough with too much to do, if you start with this type of touch, you’re gonna be disappointed in the end result.
  • Conversation. You talk to us, share your day and your feelings.  I’m sorry, I know this isn’t the default for many guys
    but when women talk to other women – it’s the sharing of feelings that make us feel connected.  I’ll talk more about talking and feelings in another blog.

    • By the way, if we have to drag the conversation out of you, you really lose point.  Here’s what that sounds like: “Hi, how was your day?” “Fine” “What did you do today?” “Same ole, same ole” “Did you see your friends?” “Yeah“.  Ok, this…this doesn’t make us feel connected.  It feels like there’s a brick wall between us and our warm energy path of connection is being rejected.
  • Laughter, especially when it’s around a shared experience or shared memory. It feels like we’re in an exclusive club because, again, that energy pathway is just between us.
  • Being A Team.  This makes us feel like we’re in “it” (life) together, working on shared goals, achieving them and having help and support getting there.

Subscribe to the RSS feed; next week’s topic: The Truth About Chocolate

After that we’ll get back to:  What Women Want – Love

If you missed it, last week’s topic was:  What Women Want – The List

Anything else you’d add to the list?


Image purchased from istockphoto.

What Women Want

Before you get to excited about the great mystery of the world being revealed here, it must be said that every woman has her own list of what she wants.

But here’s a start at a couple common threads that weave through us sassy chics.

What Women Want


Ok, let’s start with this list and explore each of these in more detail and define what each concept means.

Subscribe to the RSS feed; next week’s topic: What Women Want – Connection

If you missed it, last week’s topic was: Dos and Don’ts for Ending The First Date

Anything else you’d add to the list?